How many times have you looked in the mirror and didn’t like what you saw? Did you carry that feeling with you in your life? I used to be guilty of this. I remember dating someone who didn’t treat me right. But because I felt that I was overweight, I thought I was lucky to have him. Yep. You read that right. I felt lucky to have someone, even someone who wasn’t right for me. Why is that? I was confusing body image with self-image. What does that mean? Let me explain where I got this idea.
I used to be an avid Dr. Phil watcher. I never missed an episode. But one episode really stuck with me. It is the episode when he discussed body image versus self-image. From what I understood, he was saying that people often define their self-worth by what they see in the mirror. That resonated with me. It explains the scenario mentioned above.
Now, that I am older, I have made a conscious effort to not focus on what the scale says. And quite honestly, I have been around people all my life who have obsessed about their weight. And I knew that is not something I wanted for myself. That is not to say that I am not concerned with my weight. I know that for health reasons, I should trim the pounds. But I also am self-aware enough to know that if I am not willing to put in the work, then I don’t have any reason to complain. I am a problem solver. If there is a problem and I have a solution, but don’t take it, then I should not complain. So, I don’t. But I digress.
I am at one of the heaviest I have ever been. And you know what? I am the most confident I have ever been. It took some time to get here. I now surround myself with people who love me for me. I started making decisions that made me happy. I stopped living in the shadows of what I thought others wanted for my life. And I will admit that I still do not always like what I see in the mirror, but I love who I am. And that’s so important.
What you see in the mirror will change over time. That’s part of living. It may not be weight for you. It may be those wrinkles that have appeared over time. It may be the gray hair that is now making its debut. It may even be a scar that you now have. But please know this. God made you and loves you, not because of your outward appearance. Your true friends and family love you for who you are to them and what you bring to their lives…not what you look like. So, shouldn’t you love yourself for who you are on the inside?
I know it’s easier said than done. But trust me. You can do it. You can do anything you put your mind to. After having kids, I dreamed of writing a book and sharing my experiences. People have encouraged me to start a blog. And here I am. Living my new dream. If you want to know more about why I chose to have a blog, you can click here.
Until the next time friends, I will leave you with this. You are more than what you see in the mirror. Looks are temporary. They are forever changing. And while learning to love yourself can be challenging, you will love who you are when you do. Take it from me.